To sleep, perchance to not lose my mother effing mind
Thursday, October 9, 2008 at 10:23AM The post-cruise bliss has officially faded. I’m feeling low again. But this time I think it has more to do with sleep deprivation than anything else. Allow me to detail my last two nights and you’ll see what I mean:
Tuesday night I watched the debate and went to bed around 11. I couldn’t sleep, so I read a book for a couple hours. I still couldn’t sleep, so I got online for awhile. Still couldn’t sleep so I read some more. Around 4:30 I thought, "If I fall asleep right now, I can still get two and a half hours of sleep before work." But I tossed and turned until about 5:30 when I gave up. At that point I figured there was no way I was going to work, so I just sat up and read until 6:30 when I called in sick. I finally fell asleep a little after 7. I was awake until SEVEN IN THE MORNING! And I wasn’t even doing anything!
I slept until 11, then got up and spent the day doing homework. So on just four hours of sleep, you’d think I’d be crawling to bed last night right? Yeah, no.
I went to bed again around 11 thinking I was tired, but I could not get comfortable. I read until 12:30, trying to make myself tired. Finally I thought maybe a change of venue would help, so I went out to the couch. I flipped through magazines until I finally fell asleep with an Utne Reader across my chest at around 2. Robin’s serenade of alarms (she seriously has three different alarms going off at varying intervals for about an hour and a half—tell her she’s crazy) woke me up a little after 6. Another four hours of sleep.
I can’t go on like this, but I really don’t know what to do. Missing sleep and being tired makes everything seem worse. So even if I’m only a little sad, I feel really sad. If I’m a little lonely, I feel terribly lonely. If I’m only slightly gloomy, I feel like I’m covered in dark grey clouds.
And it’s sunny and gorgeous here today. I don’t want any damn clouds!
Reader Comments (8)
Ugh....sleep deprivation can make even the sanest lady crazy! Try to hang in there. Would a couple Tylenol PM help? Or a couple Simply Sleep--they're not habit forming. Even just getting one night of rest can get you back on track to retraining your mind to sleep.
Or might a long, hot shower/bath before bed make you sleepy enough?
Just some thoughts. I hope Mr Sandman visits you tonight.
If your still having this much trouble on Celexa, I'd call your doctors office, and tell them you might be on the wrong medication or wrong dosage, at least temporarily anyway. Just a thought.
I concur with Angela and while you're at, tell your doctor that you need something short-term to help you sleep.
Thinking of you. :o)
I'll bring a full bottle of Melatonin with me (I only used it a couple of times). Some people swear by it. You can try if you like.
Have you tried keeping track of when your insomnia occurs? The same concept of a food journal or whatever. Keeping track of your cycle and what you've eaten and how much tv you've watched, etc.
I concur though. Mention it to the doc next time you go.
When I had problems sleeping in grad school, I took a bubble bath, drank tea before bed, and listened to classical music or a tape of the rain. "They" say you should avoid the tv and computer before bed because of what the light does to your brain (telling it not to sleep). Go low tech. And do mention it to your doc if it could be the meds. Cheers!
I know exactly how you feel. I have seen every movie I own about ten times, but i still find myself watching them over and over when I cant sleep. I just started reading the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyers. Each book is about 500-700 pages and I finished all 4 in one week. And now im reading them again. Just for something to keep me sane in the wee hours when I cant sleep.
Ive had some success with one or two sleeping pills, but most of the time I only take one and not all the time. They can become a crutch.
Hi, I just found you from your comment over at Awkwardly Social... This is so random, but I can totally relate to the sleep thing. I've never been the best sleeper (I'm a night owl and the opposite of a morning person), but lately I haven't been able to sleep at all. Last night (this morning, I guess), I was up at 3:30 pretty much twiddling my thumbs because I had already tried all the things that usually work.
I read back a few entires and even though I don't know you, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for everything you're going through.
That totally stinks! I'm very much all about getting sleep (at least 7 hours). I've tried Simply Sleep and Tylenol PM and hated them both because I always woke up drowsy.
I tried Ambien for a bit and loved it but I don't know if I should recommend it since it seems like it can lead to addiction...
I hope you get some sleep!