Florida trip of aught seven

 I've been completely nonexistent around here for far too long. It's just that when I'm on vacation I like to leave the world behind, and as much as I love blogging, that's one thing I don't want to worry about when I'm concentrating on being as lazy as possible for a week. Brad posted a few updates from his Blackberry and offered to let me do so as well, but while he's quick and nimble on that miniature keyboard, I turn into a hooved horse when I start typing. So head over there for quick day to day recaps if you're interested.

I'm instead opting for some brief generalizations and a few highlights from our trip. Here, the generalizations:

Each morning we slept in, ate breakfast on the balcony, then headed down to the pool. After some sun and swimming we either walked the beach, shopped, took naps or drove down the street a ways to laugh at the crazy spring breakers. We had great weather all week, and my primary goal of complete relaxation was very nearly met. The drives down and then back up were both pretty seamless. I saw a few states I had never seen before and learned a little bit about this country (ie: Kentucky's main draws are caves and "Adult" stores; Alabama has terrible roads as evidenced by the drastic change from rough riding to smooth sailing at the Florida state line; all big cities look about the same from the highway). All in all, a very satisfactory vacation.

The highlights:

Here's a conversation I overheard between my grandpa and a friend...

Gpa's friend: So what do you think about the '08 election?
Gpa: Oh I don't know yet. Though, I do like that Osama guy.
Gpa's friend: You mean Obama?
Gpa: Yeah yeah. Obama. I did read something about him the other day though... blah blah political babble... Other than that I really like Osama.
Gpa's friend: Obama.

I dare say the hilarity of that name similarity may never get old.

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While playing the word association game in the car...

S: Warm
B: Hot
S: Sun
B: Nice
S: Mean
B: Shannon
S: That's terrible!
B: I'm sorry, it's just instinct.

During that same word association game, Brad used the word "spoon" three times, the words "dirt" and "sun" four times, and the word "penis" a fabulously phallic five times. As he says, everything comes back to those four words. Maybe he's right.

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On the night we went miniature golfing, I put on an old pair of tennis shoes which I hadn't worn since I bought my Shannon shoes back in January. Walking out to the car, I felt something strange in the bottom of my left shoe. "It feels like there's a deflated balloon under the arch of my foot. Do you think my shoes are broken?" I pondered aloud to Brad. "No you probably have [some weird disease that basketball players get]. It's a foot disease that basketball players get," he replied.

Once in the car I took off the shoe to investigate. Nope, not a deflated balloon nor [some weird disease that basketball players get]. It was an empty comdom wrapper that had been hibernating in my shoe for lord knows how long. Sexy.

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During our trip back to MI, we stopped in Bowling Green, KY for the night and had dinner at a Ruby Tuesday. Our very kind waitress asked about our trip and when she heard we had been in Panama City Beach she quipped, "I wanted to take my kids down there this month, but I just don't want them near all those spring breakers. [pause] No offense."

None taken. I was just happy she thought we both still looked young enough to be part of that crowd. Little does she know that instead of doing body shots and having casual sex until 4am, we spent our evenings watching Wheel of Fortune and playing dominos with my grandparents before going to bed at midnight.

My kind of vacation.

Comments

[daisies]

:-)

laughed out loud at the condom and yes spoon dirt sun and penis rule the world, heh heh

sounds like you guys had a fabulous time and i really enjoyed reading the highlights!! did ya get a tan? didya didya ... ahhhhh, green and blue skied warmth of a beach, sigh ....

[erica]

I could not help but laugh out loud at the condom part. That better have not been the one that ended up on the beach. I love laughing out loud. I love your writing.

[Jess]

Sounds like you had a nice vacation. I can't wait to go!