Can you tell the chair thing really bothered me? It was silly, but standing inside watching it happen, I was like, what the fuck, get it together people!

Anyway, Mike and I were inside waiting to get started. I was really warm in my dress, and even though we had both borrowed handkerchiefs from my two grandpas to dab the sweat, I needed to take a moment to cool down. I stood in front of the fan, then sat on an ottoman and closed my eyes. When I felt relaxed and cool, Mike and I took a minute to appreciate what was happening. We looked out on our family and friends, and at each other, and took it all in.

(Photos by Photography by Arika Reed.)

We both stood at different doors and waited for my sister Emily to give us the cue (a subtle nob). I was a door where nobody could see me except her, and when I opened to door a crack I heard her telling a joke. I guess she was entertaining the crowd while I took my moment to cool. When she saw me waiting, she nodded, and we walked out. We came from different doors and met at the steps of the deck. It was then I noticed the background music we were playing pre-ceremony was still on, and it was definitely NOT playing anything from the playlist Mike had made. I caught my sister Kelli’s eye and she knew I was saying, “What IS that? Turn that shit off!” Thanks Kel! I kept smiling, and Mike took my hand and helped me down the steps, then we separated again. He walked around one side of the chairs and I the other, and we met at the altar.

(Note the HILARIOUS face my little bro is making!)

Emily started by welcoming everyone and saying some sweet words she had written about us as individuals and as a couple. She wouldn’t let us hear or read that part before the ceremony, so it was nice to have a little surprise. Then we had planned this cool thing where Em was going to ask my family and friends to accept Mike, and his to accept me. She asked for “Shannon’s friends and family to please stand” but EVERYONE stood. It was a little confusing for second, but Em rolled with it, made a little joke and pressed on. It meant a lot to hear all of our most important people accept each of us into their folds.

Then Em introduced and explained our Unity Quilt. While she explained the idea behind it, how it was created and how many people contributed, Mike and I showed it off.

She also explained our Love Letter Box, and invited everyone to contribute some advice or well wishes. Then Mike and I exchanged vows and rings. We both said the same thing, words we had written together. I went first. Em asked, “Shannon, do you choose Mike to be your husband, to love, respect and honor him through all life’s changes?” And I took his ring from her and said:

I do. Mike, I choose you to be my husband and my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the man you will become. I promise to be your equal partner, love you without reservation, and comfort you in times of distress. I will encourage you to achieve all of your goals, laugh with you and cry with you, grow with you in mind and spirit, and always be open and honest with you.

I promise I will always try to give you the best of myself and love you even when you’re not at your own best. Like when the grocery store is out of double chocolate PowerBars and you take it as a conspiracy against you personally. I promise to respect you as a person with your own interests, desires, and needs, and to realize that those are sometimes different, but no less important than my own.I promise to love and cherish you through all of life’s experiences.

I take you to be my husband, knowing in my heart that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner, and one true love. I give this ring as my gift to you. Wear it and think of me and know that I love you.

Then Em asked Mike the same question, and he responded with the same words. Only his example of me not at my own best was “Like when you get upset with me for not finding your phone fast enough in your bottomless purse.”

Don’t worry, we didn’t memorize all that. Em had it written in her book and we read. See?

Em pronounced us husband and wife and invited me to kiss my groom. Then we unveiled this funny plan I have had for a long time. Mike’s tall right? Quite tall. And I’m not. So when we’re both standing and we kiss, even when I’m in heels, he has to hunch over and I get a neck cramp. So to play up our height difference, we planned this:

(Photos by Photography by Arika Reed.)

We had hidden a tree stump behind our altar, and when Em told us to kiss, that was my dad’s cue. He hopped up, grabbed the log and put it in place, then assisted me in stepping up. Just as I had hoped, it got a good laugh from those who weren’t expecting it. And it made for a gorgeous! photo.

(Photo by Photography by Arika Reed.)

At that was it! We smiled for the people…

…and walked down the aisle together. Married!

As soon as we got to the end, people got up and we were surrounded with hugs and kisses and congratulations. Good thing my immediate family knew exactly what to do to set up for the reception. They jumped immediately into action while Mike and I mingled.

And that, my friends, was our wedding. It was beautiful and perfect and fun and a little silly and it was so personalized. We wrote the whole thing and did only the things that meant something to us. I wouldn’t have changed a thing. And I’m really glad we got tons of pictures and a video. Thanks to everyone with a camera!

And I even mentioned that I was worried I wouldn’t actually fit into it the day of the wedding—I hadn’t tried it on in months, and I didn’t want to bother getting it altered. If I managed to maintain my weight, it would be fine, but I wasn’t sure I did that (as I made zero effort to do so). I figured if it didn’t fit, I’d just improvise and wear a sundress, but of course I was hoping it would.

Fortunately, when I tried it on the Friday before, it zipped up just fine.

So on Saturday I wasn’t worried at all. After hair and makeup were done, I hung out in my pajamas for awhile. I mingled with the guests that had shown up early, and took care of some last minute details. But mostly I just waited and relaxed. At one point I was sitting on the couch in a tank top and capris with immaculate hair and makeup, thinking, “I’m about to get married. Cool.”

My sisters kept telling me I should get in my dress, but I wanted to wait. It was a hot and humid day, and I wanted to be as fresh as possible for the ceremony, so waiting to don a slip and long dress was key. Finally around 3pm, they pulled me into a bedroom to get dressed.

(Yes that’s me in my slip and bra. Hey, Erica posted it on her blog, so I figured I could, too.)

I really could not be more happy with how my dress looked. Everything came together perfectly – the hair, the makeup, the shoes, the dress. I loved it all, which I think is important on your wedding day when, inevitably, you’re the center of attention. You want to feel good. And I did.

My favorite thing about the dress is that it is so very me. Even my grandpa, a man in his 70s whom I’ve never heard comment on anything to do with fashion, said that he loved my dress and thought it fit my personality perfectly. Standard wedding gowns are gorgeous, no doubt, but the strapless-white-poofy thing is just not me. This dress? So me.

And the shoes! Oh the shoes. I thought I’d go with something bright and funky, but when I saw these 1950s boudoir slippers on Etsy, I know they were meant for this dress.

Like I mentioned, Mike’s get-ready routine was much simpler, and he got dressed even before I did. He wore dark brown pants with an orange and white gingham-print shirt. During the ceremony he wore a sand-colored jacket, which he removed for the reception. He also wore sandals. We had decided he’d wear brown Skechers, but on the way to Dad’s Saturday morning, we realized we forgot them. Rather than turn around, we decided his Birkenstock sandals were just fine.

(Ceremony look.)

(Reception look.)

After we were both fully ensembled (word?), we walked around the house and yard greeting guests. We meant for this whole thing to be very casual and comfortable, so I didn’t hide out pre-ceremony. Both Mike and I chatted with people and fielded compliments (people are so sweet when you’re getting married). Once it appeared everyone had arrived, we decided to get started.

And that is where I’ll start my next post about the ceremony itself.

(All photos, except the first one and last two, by Photography by Arika Reed.)

Cross-posted at Shan & Mike.

First, we had to pound some helpful signage into the ground. Didn’t want anyone getting lost! My dad kind of lives in the middle of nowhere.

(I freehanded that sign, thankyouverymuch.)

Mike and Des (stepmom) got started on the food prep while I started in on our To Do list. Slowly others from our family began showing up to help. We set up the buffet (sans hot or cold food just yet), hooked up the ice cream machine, and prepared some final decorations and details.

At about 1:00 I passed the reins to my dad. He was in charge of making sure things got done while I was in “hair and makeup.” Erica has a great photo of Mike and I running a miniature family meeting right before I was swooped away to be made beautiful. I don’t have access to you it yet, but she says we’ll get our disc-o-photos soon. In the meantime, imagine it here.

Tune into my next post all about the fun of getting beautiful for your wedding day!

Cross-posted at Shan & Mike.

Running: The Beginning
I’m sure I did a lot of running around as a child, and there may have been the occasional mandatory two-minute run in freshman gym class, but I haven’t actually done any running in my adult life. It sounded awful to me, miserable, stupid even. But at some point many years ago I thought maybe a good life goal would be to run a 5K. The thought lingered in my mind for awhile and was eventually shelved. I figured I’m not a runner and there are better ways to spend my time and energy. And that was that. Until a few months ago.

Why I Started Couch to 5K
When I told the Giraffe I wanted to do this, he didn’t take me very seriously. Me, the anti-runner, suddenly wants to run a 5K? Come on. But somehow I got this crazy idea in my head. It was more about wanting to set a goal and attain it than it was about anything to do with fitness. I liked the Couch to 5K program because it has incremental goals, it works you up slowly, and it lays the whole thing out for you. I think much of the reason I kept going is my somewhat Type A personality. I had to stick to the schedule or the world might end! Even when I didn’t want to, I had to run when it was on the calendar – if I didn’t it would eff my whole schedule up and then my whole life would fall apart!

Early Days
The first few weeks were ok. The actual running was pretty minimal, so even when it was hard, I was comforted by the fact that the running increments were short. The weather often didn’t cooperate, which made it really difficult to force myself into running clothes and out to the trail. If I was going to quit, it was during these weeks that I’d do it. Not because it was the hardest, but because it’s easier to quit at the beginning. It’s like reading a book. Once you’re half way through, you feel like you just need to push through to the end, even if it’s bad. First few chapters though? Much easier to quit if it sucks.

Later Days
It was about Week 5 when I really started to struggle. On the third workout, suddenly I had to run 20 minutes straight and it scared the crap out of me. And it was hard. I will not lie to you. It was hard and it sucked. A lot. These last four weeks have been a real struggle. I was so busy, and it wasn’t easy to find time to run, and I never wanted to do it, and the whole time I was actually running, I wanted to be done. Yuck. I did not love it, and it took all the Type A personality I could muster to stick to that schedule.

Thinking, thinking, thinking
My biggest struggle while running is my brain. This is what it thinks while I run: “God this sucks. How long has it been? When can I stop? I wish I was almost done. How much longer? Running, running, running. I’m running. I have to run so far. I wish I was done. I can’t wait until I’m done running. How much further do I have to run?” I’ve heard about people who just get into a zone, but I have never come close to that zone. I wish I could think about other things, distract myself, but all I do is think about how much longer until I can walk. I’m a multi-tasker, and the only thing I can do while running is run. I listen to music, but it does very little to distract me.

Podcasts
Speaking of music, just before I started, I heard about the Couch to 5K podcasts on Nicole‘s site. They count down each time you have to switch from running to walking or vice versa so you don’t have to pay attention to time, but they were full of a lot of hip hop, which I grew tired of. In the last three weeks, I switched to Suz‘s podcasts. She gives time updates throughout, along with encouraging words, which is nice.

What (I wear and use), When (I find time), Where (I run)
When it was still cold, I wore yoga pants, a t-shirt, a thin hoodie and ear warmers. Now that it’s warmed up, I wear running capris and a tank top with “wicking technology.” I wear this sports bra (in green!) and these shoes, too. I use an iPod Nano with an arm band, and the solution to my earbud problem was found in some 99 cent earbuds much like these. They stay in my ears nicely! Recently, my friend Michelle surprised me with a Nike + iPod sensor, and it’s amazing. You stick the chip in your shoe (mine is in one of those tiny plastic bags that come attached to clothes and hold extra buttons, and wedged into the laces of my right shoe), and the other part into your iPod. After some setup, it tells you how far and long you’ve run, how many calories you’ve burned, and what your pace is. I highly recommend!

I run twice during the week after work, which usually sucks. By the time I leave work and drive over an hour home, all I want to do is eat dinner and chill. Instead I have to jump into running clothes, stretch, run, stretch again, and shower, all before eating dinner. When the Giraffe had class every night until 9, I was too hungry to take the time to prepare anything by the time all that was over, so I usually ended up eating cereal for dinner. Weekends are much better. Once in awhile I even looked forward to a run on a nice Sunday morning. It didn’t feel so crammed in and forced. Oh why can’t every day be a weekend?

There is a railroad-track-turned-paved-trail right behind our apartment where I run. It’s convenient, and it’s all flat! But it also gets really boring because there’s never anything new to look at.

A Couple Lessons
Stretch and drink water. Duh and duh. But I learned the hard way with both of these obvious rules. After I injured a muscle or two, the Giraffe looked up some proper pre- and post-run stretches for me. Turns out it’s really important to stretch after a run when your muscles are warm. Yeah. Also, kind of essential to drink lots of water. I didn’t really do that, and last week I got dehydrated and had a five-day headache and generally felt awful as a result. Drink. Water.

Results (or lack thereof)
Like I said, I didn’t do this to get fit or lose weight. But I thought that might be a nice side effect. I thought I might also have more energy during the day and sleep better at night. But the ONLY difference I have seen is that now I can run 30 minutes at a time, whereas nine weeks ago it was about 60 seconds. I have no more energy, I don’t sleep any better, I haven’t lost an ounce, and I don’t feel any more fit. I can run further and longer, that’s about it. I’m thrilled to have reached my goal, but I’m bummed none of that other stuff came with it.

My Saving Grace
I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to continue running after the 5K I signed up for (my ultimate goal) because if the ability to run was the only benefit of running, and if I kind of hated running, I had no reason to continue. Then the other day I ran with Michelle (of Nike + iPod fame), who has run half marathons and is getting back into training after having a baby. She ran at my pace, nice and slow, but when we got done, she gave me some advice: start as slow as I finished. I would always start out strong (for me), maybe a 10 minute mile, and wear myself out, which is why I felt like dying by the end. So today I started slow and stayed slow. My target was between an 11 and 11 1/2 minute mile, so I kept checking my Nike chip to make sure I hadn’t sped up or slowed down too much. And it worked! I felt good while running for the first time EVER. I had no doubt in my mind that I could keep it up for 30 minutes, and as I said above, I kept running for 35 minutes until I had reached five kilometers. I got back to the apartment and the Giraffe said he could tell I felt good and had a much better run than the one earlier that week. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t easy. I was sweaty, my legs hurt, there was heavy breathing, but I felt steady and strong and confident. It was an epiphany really. Thanks Michelle.

The Riverbank Run
The 5K race I signed up for is in a week, May 8. I never doubted I’d cross the finish line, even if it meant walking the majority, but now I know I’ll be able to run this damn 5K. May not be a great finish time, but I will run a 5K. I will! It helps that this thing has become a family affair. Not only is my sister Emily running with me as planned, but now my sister Andrea wants to unofficially run with us, my brother (not a runner) and sister-in-law signed up (before they knew we were!) to run it, and my dad is skipping his usual 25K to run by our side. Plus the Giraffe, Em’s fiance, and maybe some other family members are going to cheer us on from the sidelines.

I know there are people out there who run 3 miles like they’re going for a stroll, but this is a big accomplishment for me. And when my little Nike gadget told me I had hit 5 kilometers today, I was incredibly proud of myself. I am honestly one of the least likely people to have done this, ask those who know me well, so it’s pretty fucking amazing I made it this far. I won’t say that I’m a changed person, I’m not a converted runner, but I feel pretty damn good about reaching this goal.

This year BlogHer is in New York City (August 6-7), and I’d love to go, but 1) I’m paying for a wedding and honeymoon just two months prior, 2) it’s not a mere three-hour drive away, and 3) I can no longer get the student rate. The conference, unfortunately, is out. It’s just not doable.

BUT!!! I’ve gotten word that several of the same people I missed out on meeting last year will be attending this year’s BlogHer. And I want to go. Still can’t afford the conference, but I’m thinking maybe a weekend in NYC is in order. If I find a reasonable flight and some roomies, I think I can swing it. And dude! A weekend in New York with some awesome ladies! I so want that.

Here’s the question. Are you going to BlogHer? If not, are you maybe thinking weekend in New York? You know you are. Seriously, let me know if you’ll be there that weekend, conference or not. Convince me I need to go.

These kind of hand-embroidered numbers are going for $35!

I love stitching. It soothes me, and it’s one of the few things I can do for hours without getting bored. I often can’t sit through a 2 hour movie without getting antsy, but put an embroidery project in my hands and I’m captivated.

I just bought 25 of these blank baby bibs (at a nice discounted price!) because I like to make custom gifts for the new babies in my life. A friend had a baby on Wednesday, and over the weekend I made him this:

Want one for a baby in your life? I’ll make you one! (Here are a few more baby bibs I’ve done.)

Although I was resigned to my situation, I did still keep my eyes open for local job opportunities, only applying for those I’d be truly interested in accepting. But my hopes remained low when rejection after rejection rolled in. Then, suddenly, last month I found myself at an interview, and then a second interview, and then I was on the phone accepting a new position. It has its downsides, but the job is at a nonprofit (which is what I went to school for) and it’s in a field I’m really excited about. Just when I had accepted that I’d be in a holding pattern until at least June, this incredible opportunity was given to me, and I couldn’t be more grateful.

The biggest downside is that it’s not quite local. It’s in a city a little over an hour away from home. The Giraffe and I tossed around several ideas, but in the end we decided I’d commute to work until he finished school in the spring, then we’d reassess. So just as winter is setting in, I’ll be driving to and from work, an hour each way, every day. I’m not looking forward to it, but for such a good opportunity, it’s worth it.

The strange thing about getting a job right now is that along with feelings of elation and relief, I feel very guilty. I know so many people who have been laid off, are underemployed, or are stuck in jobs they loathe because they can’t find anything better. I often feel like I want to apologize for my good fortune. It’s a strange internal conflict between joy and guilt. I know I worked hard for this position – two years of school, making connections, etc. But so did many other people who aren’t being rewarded in the same way. I’m having a really hard time reconciling it with myself.

Mr. Bokbok came in the mail last week, and we found him a nice home on top of one of our bookcases:

I entered the contest to win Mr. Bokbok because I already have a collection of wooden animals that I inherited from my step-mom when she was getting rid of them. I have a whale, a turtle, a swordfish and an owl scattered around our apartment.

I thought the chicken would make a good addition. I didn’t realize it, but I guess I have a thing for wooden animals…

P.S. Valerie also just gave away some Spanish embroidered pillowcases. She seems to be of a generous nature, so you should probably keep an eye on her blog.

]]> http://www.doahleigh.com/2009/12/mr-bokbok/feed/ 1 http://www.doahleigh.com/2009/11/merci/ http://www.doahleigh.com/2009/11/merci/#comments Thu, 26 Nov 2009 15:53:15 +0000 Shannon http://www.doahleigh.com/?p=2472 Right now, I have to admit, I’m most thankful for a four-day weekend and the fact that I got to sleep in until 10 this morning. Family, friends, food, shelter, health, wealth… definitely appreciate that stuff too. I try to never take it for granted. I know I’m blessed in so many ways, and as I head off to a Thanksgiving celebration with my whole family, I’m reminded of that.

But this morning I can’t help but say a big THANK YOU for feeling rested and for the long weekend ahead of me.

This is me at my junior prom:

I loved that purple shimmery dress so much. I didn’t have a date that year, but I had more fun than I did at senior prom, to which I went with my then boyfriend. Boys are lame.

This one is from our Super Bowl party:

Some friends and I got together one year on Super Bowl Sunday and pretended like we cared. We smoked fake cigars (beef sticks), drank fake beer (soda), played fake poker (Go Fish, I’m sure) and had the game on in the background. Or maybe we just watched a movie, I can’t remember. My shirt says “I Heart Aerobics.” Ha!

My friends and I also had a thing about the Spice Girls. We weren’t necessarily huge fans, but we loved imitating them. We were the Spice Girls for Halloween, for fun photo shoots, and even for skits at band camp. Oh yes, band camp. That’s where this particular Spice Girls shot came from:

If you’re curious, I started out as Ginger Spice, but senior year I cut my hair short and so moved into the Posh Spice role. (Sorry I didn’t get permission to put the other girls on this site, hence the stars. But me as Posh doesn’t have quite the same affect without the full photo, so I couldn’t crop of course.)

And last, this is me and Erica in our marching band uniforms:

I played the flute from 6th to 12th grade, both marching and concert band. All my friends were in band, so I actually really enjoyed it. Erica and I met in 6th grade when she moved to our school and sat next to me in band. We’ve been friends ever since.

I promise you I was seriously dorky earlier in life, so I’ll have to dig those out someday.