Last week, Amanda at Mandajuice posted a recipe for a crab dip that looked divine. I thought about it for days, mouth watering, stomach growling. Finally I enlisted Robin to help me throw together the ingredients and make our own batch.

We headed to the store to buy ingredients since we are both completely lame and have NO food in our kitchens. We had to buy all but the onion and mayonnaise. Which means we also had to buy a bottle of chardonnay, a task we both loathed because we loathe chardonnay and knew we’d never use more than the 1/3 cup the recipe called for. But we didn’t want to mess with the recipe even a little, so we bought the cheapest bottle on the shelf.

We got to her apartment, unpacked our goods, prepared to cook, and realized she didn’t have a cork screw. No problem, I live two seconds away, we can go get mine. I called Brad and asked him to look for it while we drove over, and guess what. Yep, he couldn’t find it. Anywhere. See how often we drink wine? So we had to drive all the way to the store again, which shouldn’t be a big deal, except I’m a big baby and this is why I don’t cook. Because nothing is EVER simple. Even the simplest recipes become a big deal one way or another. I was ready to bail on the whole project, but Robin convinced me to push on, so to the store we went where she purchased the cheapest cork screw available.

What happens when you use a cheap cork screw? Your cork crumbles before it’s out of the bottle, causing yet another ridiculous hassle and reason not to cook. I officially hate that this recipe calls for wine, but nobody better dare tell me we coud have gotten away without it because I will injure you.

After the wine debacle, things went pretty smoothly. We drained crab meat, squeezed lemon wedges, minced garlic (though we didn’t have a garlic press so we used a knife… don’t tell Amanda), and diced onion.

After all the chopping, we dumped everything in a pot and added a bunch of gooey, creamy, fatty stuff.

Which was heated and stirred for only about 10 minutes. We didn’t make stuffed mushrooms like Amanda did, and we didn’t even bake the sourdough like her alternate recipe suggested. Instead, we just cut up our hunk of bread…

…and ate the dip warm.

It was definitely worth the work—it was everything she promised it would be. Except holy hell it makes a lot! That little portion you see there, that was practically a drop in the bucket of crab dip we made. Luckily it’s pretty good reheated, but now that it’s been a week since we made it, and there’s still a barrel of it in my fridge, I’m trying to figure out the best way to dispose of it without making my kitchen smell like a fishing dock. Ideas?

If anyone is interested in trying this recipe, check out Mandajuice. She also just made a Magic Meatloaf that’s looking pretty delicious right now. I’ll let you know if I try that too.