I’ve had a lot on my mind lately, but I’ve been severely lacking in the motivation, desire or ability to write about it. Two really sad things happend to people I know in the last few days, and I so badly want to put it all into eloquent words, but I don’t feel worthy of that.

I want to tell everyone about these things, make them share in the sadness that other people are experiencing, but who I am to exploit their hardship? Am I even allowed to be shaken up by these things? Because what I’m feeling, mostly shock and confusion, is nothing compared to what those directly involved are experiencing. How does my sadness ease their pain in any way?

But at the same time, how can I ignore these things? Isn’t it a disservice to the people suffering to simply frown and shake my head? Shouldn’t I be learning from their tragedies, shouldn’t I be reminded to appreciate every minute I have, shouldn’t I try to feel their pain with them, put myself in their shoes and hurt with them? But again, how does that make them feel any better? It doesn’t take away their pain or reverse the terrible things they’ve experienced, it doesn’t bring back the people they love or make it any easier for them to say goodbye. It doesn’t help them accept the tragic things life has recently given them.

All I want is to make it all better, to take back what happened, to erase their pain. But I’m powerless to do any of that, and nothing I write will even come close. I have no words.